I have this phrase that I use a lot: let the farts smell. We all often point out when somebody makes a mistake or says something hurtful or does something hurtful. Now we are the one nagging and complaining. Now we are the problem so to speak because we are pointing out somebody else's character flaw or mistake. Or smelly fart as I like to say. When we are dealing with somebody that is an addict or a narcissist and we point out their behavior it is very easy for that person to turn and tell us what we are doing wrong. So watch yourself do it differently it's hard. It's really hard. And yet when I can walk away from the other person's nastiness or bad behavior and let the farts smell I can perhaps take care of myself by disengaging from that situation. Often when we try to get someone to get it or point out the fart we are the one that becomes the nag. I want to help you not be the nag. I want to help you not be the bad guy. Perhaps your boss or your partner will notice their nastiness or bad behavior. They may not. However when you are trying to get them to get it and trying to point it out now you are the squeaky wheel. Now you are the problem. You are not letting them get away with bad behavior you are just not engaging in it. And you are not trying to be the nag. It is their behavior it's not your fault it's not your problem. So do it differently really work on detaching. Really work on not trying to get the other person to get it. Really work on not letting the fart smell on you. Walk away. Disengage. you are not letting them get away with it you are walking away from it.